On Falling in Love, Lessons From my Apartment Search - Guest Post by Mira Katz
I consider myself a career woman, and often put business goals first, way before personal ones. I'm young, so if my biological clock is ticking, it is doing so faintly and in the distant background. My search for love is not rushed - I've given myself another decade or two. It is the least of my worries.
But when April 1st hit, I became desperate for the search for an apartment.
As if I was conjuring up the perfect man, I made my wish list. My equivalent of tall, dark, and handsome was: top floor, granite counters, and a nice view.
Lesson 1: Prioritize what's actually important to you
I found tall dark and handsome. We visited the newest high-rise downtown, with elegant finishings, a massive pool, a view of the city, and state of the art facilities.
I felt nothing.
The fridge was small, the bedroom was tiny, there was no personality. On my second visit I realized how bored I would be in that fancy apartment in the middle of the concrete jungle and I burst into tears.
I didn't want to be charmed by appliances and finishings, I wanted to fall in love.
Lesson 2: You deserve to fall in love
Everything online seemed mediocre at best. Maybe someone could set me up?
I called up my friends in the real estate business and we went to visit a place in my favourite neighbourhood. "You'll love it" they said. "It’s in the right area, and it’s totally furnished". They could have been saying "You'll love him, he's from a good family and is well dressed."
But alas, the hallways were old and the apartment was small and overpriced.I was neither charmed nor in love.
Lesson 3: Don't settle
So I called in real backup... my mom. She would send me daily reports from all the corners of the internet, and I would book visits to my top picks at night after my long days. "Look at this one, it’s a good price" ... "How about this? It has the countertop you like".
Each profile was an awkward medley of potentially good characteristics, but none of them made me feel excited. Out of true desperation, I went to visit them: I was willing to go on a first date.
Half of them weren't available by the time I requested a visit (I was starting to think the apartment hunt was more ferocious than the dating world) and the other half made me feel uncomfortable.
"Am I going to have to move into a place like this?" I thought to myself."Is this really all that's on the market?" I worried."Maybe I should lower my expectations and be less picky?" I spiralled."No," said my inner voice, "don't settle."
Lesson 4: When you know you know
It was a Tuesday evening, and I had visited two gross apartments earlier that day. After a long shower, I sat down to see the daily list that my mom had compiled.
To my surprise, one of them looked decent, nice even! And the price was right! I pounced."We need to see this. Tomorrow." I messaged my real estate broker.
Usually my days are packed, and arranging visits is a scheduling nightmare, but on that Wednesday, I was peculiarly open - not a SINGLE meeting - I was available any time.
When we approached the building, I recognized it from my distant memories. It was on the bike bath of the canal leading to the market. I used to envy the people who lived there, and as a little girl I told myself THAT would be the perfect place for me.
We were greeted by the sweetest woman, who made me feel happy and at ease. She led us to her apartment, and a wave of calm washed over me. Before I could find the words, my mom yelled "This is it!". This was it.
Lesson 5: It will be more perfect than you could have imagined
It had things that weren't even on my list: a walk-in closet, access to the canal, a private dock with kayaks, and 10ft floor-to-ceiling windows.
The things that I thought were important didn't even bother me. The counter was not granite, but I didn't care, it seemed irrelevant.
My heart was beating a little faster, and I couldn't wipe the smile off my face.
There were already two offers on the table from other visitors, but I knew it didn't matter. I knew that I would get it; it was the place for me, and I was the right person for that place.
I was in love.---Mira KatzMira is a full time tutor/entrepreneur. Running a learning centre by day, and building a new modern school by night, she is a lover of good ideas and a seeker of awe and inspiration. You can find her at www.mirakatz.com and soon at her new venture, Maison d'Étude (launching in August 2018).