Future Tripping...The Sneaky Saboteur

Future Tripping...

Is a sneaky saboteur that I see women fall prey to all. of. the. time.

It seems so innocent to daydream about the man you’ve just met, and how

great it will be to introduce him to your friends and family.

Or to imagine spending the rest of your life with someone you’ve known for a

couple of months.

I also see future tripping trip up women in long term relationships in a

different way – where they might start to “trip” over all the things that can

go wrong in their relationship.

What if their partner can’t meet all of their expectations?

What if they end up disappointed? Hurt?

What if they try to have kids and it doesn’t work out for them?

Future tripping is a trap I see few escape.

For the sake of this article, I want to focus on how future tripping when you

first meet someone is especially dangerous (read, tricky).

This is where all kinds of projections come in.

He seems like such a great guy.

It’s been two weeks and he’s sent me a message every single day.

I can tell he really like me.

Great! All green flags letting you know you can continue on safely.

And still, you don’t actually know this person.

You might know what you want to know about him.

Or what he wants you to know.

You might even be in tune enough to know his soul...you can sense it, feel it,

there’s a connection here.

And still, he is not only a soul...he is also very much a human.

Having his very human experience.

Which is often complicated and presents the opportunity for a lot of fear and strange behaviours to arise.

Give it space, sister.

Give it time, Queen.

Though you might feel like you know him, and I really do get that feeling –

there is so much left for this person to reveal about himself.

It’s not about proceeding with “caution”, it’s about proceeding safely.

One step at a time. One green flag at a time.

Otherwise, you end up “making your mind up” about who someone is, and

missing the truth of what they present to you.

People unconsciously wear masks when they’re first getting to know someone.

Heck, you do it, too. So rather than going all in with someone you hardly know, only to regret it

later and require months of recovery –

Take your time.

Savour the process of getting to know him.

Let him reveal himself to you, and you to him, like the pages of a great novel.

Only better with time.

With love,

Diana