Open that bottle of glittery instant forgiveness, pour it all over yourself and you’ll stop that shit dead in its tracks.
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Asking your future self (who is always a more evolved version of you), what she would have you do, is an incredibly powerful way to make a choice.
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Get clear on how you are creating your own pattern in relationships - and the veil will start to lift.
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If you bring your best self along the journey, what waits for you on the other side of your current dilemma are clear green pastures.
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At the core of most wounded expectations (let’s be clear that some expectations and standards are healthy AND necessary) is the belief that you are not enough/not worthy/not seen.
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Every little bit of fear you uncover presents a new path for more love.
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Rather than feeling stuck in the relationship, or stuck trying to change a person who resists your efforts, focus solely and only on how YOU show up.
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All too often we hold our partners to certain expectations and reply with a wounded response when they don’t manage to meet them all (spoiler alert: they never will).
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How were you feeling leading up to the latest moment of bliss with your partner? Do that regularly BEFORE trying to fix anything in your relationship.
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Consider all the subtle ways you are belittling your partner and notice -- truly notice -- the ways it is blocking love in your relationship.
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Maybe if you do not make a remark in response to his frustration, or take the issue further, he will just drop it and start to rethink things for himself.
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You, my dear, are not crazy. You simply need to see it for what it is: someone who is not willing to open the windows and let in more light.
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Emotional intelligence - the awareness of your feelings, your willingness to sit with them and pay attention to them and your ability to express them in healthy constructive ways, is the long game. This is something each and every one of us can do.
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Take a wholehearted look at each individual as just that - an individual, fabricated by the same hands of Divinity as you.
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This is the story of Emily and how she went from being highly triggered inside of her relationship to now experiencing it as the best it has ever been.
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It is always about how you show up in the little moments...the little windows of opportunity that await you to actually enjoy what you have -- now.
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How would your relationships be different if you made appreciation greater than criticism and expectation? The larger point of view is that yes, you could use some more help with x, y, z - AND, you are not acknowledging all the wonderful things your man is already doing.They are not mutually exclusive.
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Do you see me? Am I worthy? Do I matter? Somewhere along the way, we get the message that the answer is not entirely so and this belief is deeply damaging.
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You do not want to be the mother or boss of your significant other. You want to be his actual partner! So first and foremost, you need to start acting that way.
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The next time you find yourself frustrated with your man, have some compassion and remember that just like you, he too is on an ever-unfolding path.
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